New Stories Started

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Hello everyone, I hope that you all are well. My mind has been pretty busy coming up with new content. If you are new to this blog I want to tell you that I post a lot of my fiction stories on Substack.com under Pennie’s Writing’s. During the end of September and now all of October I have the Spook Season Stories series going where I post a spooky story once a week. I also posted yesterday the first story of a new children’s book that I am writing. It will be filled with many adventures that a pale orange-colored kitten named Shrimp will have. The first story is titled “Shrimp Meets The World” where she is born inside of the hollow trunk of a large oak tree, and she learns that she has an older brother named Tiger and a loving mom named Momma. She also looks outside of the tree for the first time and sees the beauty of the farm that she lives on, and meets a blackbird named Billy.

Today I posted the first chapter of a new story that will involve various murders and I titled it, “The Peace Lily Murders” which you can find here https://penniersn.substack.com/p/the-peace-lily-murders?sd=pf . This story is a subscriber supported story that will be filled with many chapters of murder, mystery, and determination by a detective to find and catch the killer. I made this story paid so that with helpful supporters like you, I am able to keep many of my other stories free. So please go on over to my Substack platform https://penniersn.substack.com/ and check out all the stories that I have been writing since January of 2022. I am sure that you will find a story that will keep your interest.

Have a great weekend everyone and happy reading.

Spook Season Series

As we enter the fall season which is my favorite, I have added a new series to my Substack platform. It will only have seven stories total in the series and I started it last week. I will have a different story written once a week until Halloween. In this post will be the second story of the series. If you would like to read the first story you can click here https://penniersn.substack.com/p/spook-season-stories?r=17kzw6&s=w&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web

Now, on to the second story. Happy reading.

Joey’s parents Rob and Tina, signed Joey up once again for summer camp even though he told them that he didn’t like it last year. Joey’s dad told him that he will benefit from what he learns at Lakeview Summer Camp. Joey grumbled as he packed his backpack with the most recent issues of the Green Lantern comic book and his flashlight. He also stuffed a can of bug spray and two small bags of Cheetos inside.

As Rob drove down the heavily wooded and winding road to the camp, Joey dreaded every minute of it. As they pulled into the parking lot, it was full of buses and cars dropping off young campers. Rob pulled into a parking spot and they all got out of the car. Joey’s mom Tina gave Joey a big hug goodbye. His dad handed him the suitcase and told him that they will see him in four weeks. Joey walked toward the main lodge and glanced back at his parents. Rob and Tina waved as Joey hesitated to go inside.

Joey was greeted by one of the counselors that remembered him from last year, “hello, it’s Joey right? I’m Rebecca the activities counselor. Do you remember me?”

Joey nodded his head yes while she took his suitcase from him. Rebecca walked him over to the sign-in table and introduced him to Ben. Ben is a new counselor who helps with the boys. Rebecca told Ben that Joey is a little shy at first but is a good team player when he gets used to everyone. Ben signed Joey in and then directed him over to the group for cabin six. As Joey was waiting to go to his cabin, Mr. Frank, the owner of camp Lakeview called out and brought attention to a rules board.

On the board were six rules:

No food in the cabins/eat at meal times

No fighting

Listen to your counselors

Stay clean

Participate

Stay within the campgrounds

When Mr. Frank was done going over the rules, he welcomed everyone and then went into his office. After all the campers were signed in and assigned a cabin, Ben took Joey and the other boys to their cabin. Joey was among nine other boys in cabin six ranging from ages ten to fourteen. Joey was twelve this year and felt a little more at ease with the older boys. Ben told the boys to put their clothes away and that he will be back in about twenty minutes.

Joey picked his bed and quickly shoved his clothes into the drawers of the dresser next to the bed. When he was done, he sat down on the bed and pulled out one of his comic books. He glanced through the comic while the other boys unpacked and got acquainted with each other. When Counselor Ben came back to the cabin, he sat down by the empty fireplace and asked the boys if they wanted to hear a scary story. It was a story that he heard when he was a kid years ago. Some of the boys sat down on the floor of the cabin, but Joey laid down on his stomach at the foot of his bed and listened.

Ben started the story with once upon a time…

A little old grey-haired woman lived in a cabin much like this one. He said that she had two sons but they got married and moved out leaving her to take care of herself. Well, the old woman just put the last two pieces of cut wood into the fireplace that she had burning. She knew that she needed more wood and had to go out into the woods and somehow cut down another tree. Her sons usually did the chopping for her before but now it’s up to her.

The sun was low in the sky so the old woman picked up the ax and carried it out into the woods. She smiled when she saw a fallen tree on the ground. The tree however was as thick in diameter as a truck tire is round. The old woman lifted the head of the ax high into the air and brought it down as hard as she could. The sharp blade penetrated the wood but only a quarter of an inch. She pried the ax out of the tree and attempted another chop. Once again, the blade went in only a quarter of an inch. The old woman knew that if she was to continue, it was going to take a long time to cut through that tree. She decided to look around for a smaller tree to cut down.

While she was wandering the woods looking for a smaller tree, she heard a noise behind her. She stopped and looked around but didn’t see anything. She continued on her search and went deeper and deeper into the woods but never found a smaller tree to cut down. By this time the sun had set and the temperature was getting colder. The old woman started to shiver. I should head back home, she thought even though she didn’t have any wood. The old woman turned around and walked back in the direction she thought she came from, but nothing looked familiar to her.

Feeling tired, she came across a large stump and sat down to rest. Even though it was almost dark she needed to catch her breath. She looked up into the tops of the trees and thought, I wish my husband was still here with me. The old woman sat there and listened as the crickets started to chirp and the nighttime critters crawled among the dried leaves. She could also hear and feel the cool breeze as it blew through the trees. She sat there shivering, tired, and unsure of which way led back home.

The old woman thought of her sons and wondered if she would ever see them again. I could die out here and they would never know it, she thought. Just then she heard the rustling of more leaves in the woods behind her. She turned around and stared into the now dark woods.

“Who’s there?” she called out.

The crunching of leaves got louder as the person or thing got closer.

“I could use some help,” the old woman said.

All the boys listened intensely and wondered what it was that was in the woods.

All of a sudden the crunching of the leaves stopped. The old woman’s heart was beating fast as she sat there and glanced all around her. The sounds of the crickets had also stopped. There was complete silence now in the dark woods as the old woman looked around. Not sure what she should do, she slowly stood up. Still looking around, she took one step forward and heard the snap of a stick. Just then, as she turned to look, a large hairy grey wolf jumped on her and pushed her to the ground.

Just like that, Jason, the oldest boy burst through the cabin door wearing a hairy wolf mask. Joey and the younger boys screamed while Ben and Jason started to laugh at them. Joey’s heart pounded in his chest and his face turned red. Ben tried to calm the other boys down by telling them that it was only a story. Joey felt angry and embarrassed while Jason laughed at him. Jason then turned and walked over to help Ben with the younger boys. As they calmed the younger boys down, they suddenly heard a deep growl. Everyone turned to look and saw a large hairy grey wolf on Joey’s bed snarling at them.

Who is scared now?

The End.

To receive more of these stories go to my Substack platform and subscribe so that you can get them right to your email. https://penniersn.substack.com/

Thank you and have a wonderful day.

Poetry, My New Series

On my Substack platform I started a poetry series. I haven’t written poetry in years but I see that it is still popular. I posted a short poem last week about what it’s like inside of my mind sometimes. But this week, I just posted one about the loss of loved ones which I will share with you on here. I wrote this one because within the past few years there has been so much death. Whether it would be from natural, Covid, or suicide, so many of us have lost people we love. Also, I found out that the last couple of months my aunt and uncle have been ill. My aunt, (my deceased mom’s sister) is still alive and has been moved to a special care facility but my uncle passed away the other morning. RIP uncle Herb. My aunt goes in and out of dementia which is also hard on my cousins, but she is aware now that she lost her husband. I haven’t physically seen my relative’s in many years but with Facebook it is almost like seeing them and their families.

September is also suicide awareness month and it’s unfortunate if you have lost someone that way but it is important. People who have died because of suicide shouldn’t be looked upon as being in the wrong like some people think. It’s a serious struggle that some people have and decide that there is no other way out for them. This is why there needs to be more acknowledgement and care for people who struggle with mental illness. The struggle can be as simple as depression, and if it’s not treated properly there is the risk of suicide. But no matter how they died, the loss of a loved one can hurt because we are never fully prepared to say goodbye to them. The poem I wrote below is a dedication to all who have lost someone they love.

To Lose Someone

To lose someone we love, we can’t emotionally prepare for.

To see them, to talk to them, to hug them, and then to lose them.

One minute here, the next minute gone.

How does this happen?

Why does this happen?

To lose someone we love can be devastating.

The sadness, the loneliness, the fear, and the uncertainty.

One minute here, the next minute gone.

How does this happen?

Why does this happen?

To lose someone we love can leave us with questions.

Why me? Why him? Why her? Why us?

One minute here, the next minute gone.

How does this happen?

Why does this happen?

To lose someone we love is unavoidable.

To lose someone we love should be expected.

To lose someone we love can be a blessing.

Why?

Because we do love.

We aren’t immortal.

We are sympathetic.

Cherish them while on earth and bless them when they leave.

For we will see them again in another lifetime.

___________________________________ PRSN _________________________________

Feel free to comment below and to read my other poem you can go to: https://penniersn.substack.com/p/trapped-inside-my-own-mind?r=17kzw6&s=w&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web

Unexplained Encounter

Chapter 3

The police and the search party spent the rest of the day searching for Linda at the preserve. Other than the cell phone, they didn’t find her or anything else. The sun was starting to set when sheriff Luis called deputy Rhonda Dean and asked for an update on their progress. She told him about finding Linda’s cell phone but nothing else. The sheriff told her to wrap up the search out there and come back to town.

“Let’s move on to interviewing the people in Linda’s social circle. I’ve already talked to Dean Simmons at the college,” the sheriff said.

“Okay sheriff,” deputy Dean ended the call.

Linda’s mother Cathy sat at her home and anxiously waited to hear from the police. Joann, Linda’s close cousin sat in her dorm room in Texas and waited for her aunt Cathy to call her with some news. Joann tried to do some studying besides checking her phone for missed notifications. When 8 pm rolled around, Joann couldn’t wait any longer and called her aunt Cathy.

“Hi Joann, let me call you back, the police are here now,” Her aunt ended the call.

Joann looked at her phone and wondered what the police might be telling her aunt. She turned on the television and grabbed a bag of plain chips. Joann munched on the chips and stared at the TV while she nervously waited for her aunt to call her back. It wasn’t until 9 pm when aunt Cathy returned Joann’s call.

“Did they find her?” Joann answered her phone.

“No, not yet,” Cathy said.

Cathy went on to tell Joann that they found Linda’s phone lying in a grassy area. She also told her that the police were asking for all of Linda’s friends’ names and contacts. She told Joann that she will probably be called too since they are so close. Joann started to cry so Cathy tried to comfort her. She told Joann that there is still hope because they didn’t find her body out there.

“I know, but we still don’t know where she is,” Joann cried.

“I know dear, but we have to have faith that she is okay and that she will come home,” Cathy fought back the tears.

“If she’s not back or found tomorrow, I’m coming up there. Summer break starts next week anyway,” Joann sniffled.

“Okay, I could use your help and company anyway. Try and get some sleep tonight and I will call you tomorrow,” aunt Cathy said.

“Alright aunt Cathy, you try and rest as well. Good night.”

“Good night dear,” Cathy ended the call and put her cell phone down.

Cathy did one more check on Facebook and didn’t see any activity from Linda. Where are you, she thought. Cathy went into the kitchen to make a sandwich and get something to drink. She poured herself a glass of milk and carried it and her sandwich into the family room. She sat down and watched the local news while she ate. The newscaster mentioned a missing college student. Cathy focused on what the lady was saying. The police sent the network a photo of Linda and asked them to ask the community for help. This gave Cathy more hope and she was touched by the sincere focus that the police have on finding her daughter.

Joann turned on a funny movie titled, “Bridesmaids” to hopefully ease her mind for a while. She lay down on her bed on her side and grabbed her pillow. She tucked it under her head and left cheek and watched the movie. Her focus on the silly scenes of the movie relaxed her enough to drift off to sleep. Joann and Linda grew up close and are both freshmen in college. They went to different schools only because of the career interest that Joann has, the colleges in Utah didn’t carry.

Linda is a slender, 5’6” tall, short-haired blonde with a love for animals and nature. Joann is a little chunky and 5‘4” with long red hair. The two of them have been inseparable growing up until Joann moved to Texas to learn more about actuarial science. Linda wants to do everything she can to help the animals on the planet. So she’s focused on her conservation and ecology studies. Whereas Joann is more into understanding money and everyone’s financial future.

Even though the cousin’s career choices are different, they both are driven to protect something. Linda and Joann have always loved and cared about their family and friends. Linda’s mother Cathy, has raised Linda by herself since she turned five. Linda’s father died in a horrific car crash which was hard on them all at the time. Joann’s parents died in a train crash when she was ten and her aunt Cathy took her in then. The two young women have struggled a lot in their lives but together they have had the drive to overcome every difficulty. With Cathy and Joann’s prayers and faith, Linda will be found.

To read more of this story please go to https://penniersn.substack.com/ and look for chapter 4. If you subscribe to this story you will receive the rest of the chapters as they are written in your email.

Writer’s Block VS. Writer’s Burnout

I’m sure that all writer’s have encountered and struggled with at least one of these during their career. First of all, what are they and what’s the difference?

Writer’s Block-

Writer’s block is usually a temporary slowdown in the creative’s mind that may hinder the process of their work. For example: As a writer, I can have an idea, but when it comes to putting it down in writing, I am unsure what to write. My brain seems to freeze up and I’m unable to come up with the right words. Sometimes not having an idea at all to write about can be a struggle as well. There are so many topics to write about but not knowing how to make it your own can be challenging too. And having writer’s block can be stressful especially if you are up against a deadline. So, why is writer’s burnout so different?

Writer’s Burnout-

Writer’s burnout is where the writer is mentally and physically exhausted from the stress that comes along with writing as a career. This can happen when a writer doesn’t allow themselves to take breaks from writing. When the writer is constantly writing with no time off due to guilt of not writing can burn them out. Burnout can also happen if your brain becomes overwhelmed with too many ideas. For example: The idea of writing a book the same time as writing short stories or blogs for other platforms. Writer’s such as myself think that we can handle all types of projects at the same time. And some of us can for a short time without a break. But if time off isn’t incorporated into the schedule eventually, burnout will happen.

The Outcome Of Writer’s Block Or Burnout-

What happens if you have writer’s block or burnout? Stress, loss of work, and the feeling of incompetency is just to name a few. A writer may start to question his or her ability and talent. Depression could come from burnout if time off is not taken. I have dealt with depression from unrelated reasons and it is a struggle. So how can a writer avoid writer’s block and burnout? You can’t entirely. Writer’s block will happen because the mind can only store so much and produce so much at a time. The extreme of writer’s burnout can hopefully be lowered if the writer makes sure to include time off and breaks.

How To Avoid Burnout

As a writer I enjoy what I do so taking time off or taking breaks makes me feel guilty. But staring at a computer screen or a pad of paper can be hard on the eyes. And constantly thinking about what to write next or how to write it can take a toll on the brain. We all need time away from the work that we do to refresh our body and mind. Right now, in the morning is when I seem the most focused so I write. I will work on my projects sometimes four hours without a break. I have learned that when I start to lose focus, I need a break. Sometimes my breaks are about an hour and sometimes about fifteen minutes. Depending on how I feel. I try to write at least six days a week for at least four to five hours per day. It might not seem like much but the constant thought process is tiring.

When I started my hand at writing, ideas were always flowing and I could write for hours, but now after completing three rather long stories, the ideas have slowed down and I tire easily. This is why time away from writing is a must in my opinion. Take a day or two off and go outside or go somewhere that will let your mind be free for a while. Enjoy what is around you and you will find that inspiration could come from somewhere that you didn’t expect it to. And cut down on how many projects that you do at one time. I am currently working on three stories and would like to get another one going but it’s been difficult. My mind can only come up with so many ideas and words in a day. So, don’t feel guilty if you can’t write everyday all day. Do what you can and schedule time away, otherwise you will burnout.

Please feel free to let me know how you cope with writer’s block and writer’s burnout.

If you haven’t read any of my stories yet, please go to https://penniersn.substack.com/ and you will find murder, mystery, ghosts, and even a children’s story.

Unexplained Encounter

Chapter 2

Sheriff Douglas Luis was called by deputy Rhonda Dean and was informed about the missing college student. He told deputy Dean that he will call the K-9 unit and direct them to meet her at the preserve. And in the meantime send the mother (aunt Cathy) home just in case Linda shows up there.

“Okay, will do sheriff,” deputy Dean said.

Deputy Dean told Cathy that the K-9 unit is going to come but that she needs to go home. Cathy argued with the deputy at first about going home when she could be there to help. After Deputy Dean explained, Cathy understood that if Linda was abducted by someone, they might call her house. The deputy took Cathy’s cell phone number and her house phone number and sent her on her way. Before Cathy left the parking lot of the preserve, she called Joann.

“Hi aunt Cathy, did you find her?” Joann answered her cell phone.

“No, but the police are searching and they are having a K-9 unit come.”

“Oh, good. I’m sure they’ll find her,” Joann said.

“They told me to go home just in case for some reason Linda shows up or someone calls the house,” Aunt Cathy said.

“But her car is there, why would she show up at your house without her car?” Joann stood up from her chair.

“I don’t know Joann, but we have to trust what the police say,” aunt Cathy said.

“Okay, I guess… How are you doing with all this?” Joann asked.

“Well, I’m scared… I don’t know where my baby is. But I have to get going home now. I’ll keep you informed Joann,” aunt Cathy wiped the tears from her eyes.

“Okay, Aunt Cathy… She’ll come home, don’t you worry,” Joann fought back the tears.

Aunt Cathy ended the call and left the preserve parking lot. She headed back to her house with the hope that for some strange reason Linda would be there. Joann looked at her phone to see if she received any notifications from Linda. She also opened up her Facebook App to see if Linda had posted anything on her page but found nothing. Where are you Linda, Joann thought.

When Linda’s mom arrived at her house, she ran inside but found no one. Linda wasn’t there and there weren’t any messages on the answering machine. Cathy sat down at her desk and turned on her computer. She wanted to check Facebook for any activity from her daughter. Cathy checked her notifications and her page and found no new activity. She sent a message to Linda hoping that she would respond. She also created a post to go to Linda’s page asking her friends for help.

While Joann was on Facebook, she received a notification. But when she opened it, it was the post that her aunt Cathy just posted. That’s a good idea, she thought. Joann was friends with a couple of Linda’s friends on Facebook, so she messaged them. She asked them if they had heard from Linda in the last few hours. Her friend Jenna responded right away and said no. Joann messaged her back and asked when she last talked to her. Jenna answered two days ago, why what’s going on? Joann went on to explain to her.

Cathy called Linda’s roommates and asked them if they have heard from Linda yet. They told her no and that they will look for her at the coffee shop where they all liked to hang out at. Cathy thanked them and ended the call. Cathy sat there looking at a picture of Linda on Facebook and started to cry. All the thoughts and worries that were running around in her mind finally overwhelmed her.

At the preserve, two K-9 units were there along with a search group that the police put together. They searched for about an hour before one of the K-9s found a cell phone. It was lying in an open but grassy area about 100 feet away from the main path. The deputy called deputy Dean and told her that they found a cell phone and where. Deputy Dean rushed over to the area and looked down. She then called Cathy and asked what Linda’s cell phone looks like.

“Did you find my baby?” Cathy cried.

“No, just a cell phone,” deputy Dean said.

Cathy told her that it was a Samsung and that it has a pink glittery case on it. Deputy Dean looked at the deputy standing by her and nodded her head yes.

“Cathy, I want you to stay calm. She might have just dropped it and wasn’t aware of it.”

“It’s hers isn’t it?” Cathy cried.

“Yes, we believe it is. We’re going to continue looking for her now and I’ll keep you posted,” Deputy Dean said.

“Okay,” Cathy ended the call and cried.

Deputy Dean glanced at the surrounding area and observed the way the grass was laying, “doesn’t it look like something big was sitting on this grass for a while?”

“Yes it does,” the other deputy looked around.

If you would like to catch up with this story, you can go to https://penniersn.substack.com/ to read more. By later today I will have seven chapters already written under Pennie’s Writing’s. Thank you and I hope that you enjoy it.

Unexplained Encounter

Chapter 1

Joann was talking with her cousin Linda in Utah when the connection was lost. Joann dialed the number again and didn’t hear any rings or voicemail. That’s strange, she thought. She called her cousin’s cell phone one more time and still didn’t hear anything. Hmm, I wonder if it’s storming there, she thought. There have been times before when the signal up where Linda lives wasn’t very good. I guess I’ll try her later, Joann thought.

As evening approached, Joann didn’t hear back from Linda as she had hoped. She was trying to focus on her studies but had a bad feeling. Joann called Linda’s cell phone again but still heard nothing. She called Linda’s mother, her aunt Cathy, and talked to her. Her aunt Cathy hadn’t heard from her since the day before. Joann asked her aunt if Linda was having any problems with her cell service, and she said that she didn’t think so.

Aunt Cathy told Joann that maybe she got busy. She said that if she doesn’t hear from her in the morning that she will drive over there. Joann was hesitant but accepted that answer and wished her aunt a good night. So, Joann went back to studying for another couple of hours before she called it a night.

The next morning Joann was running late and had to get to class. She wanted to call Linda but didn’t have time. When she got to class she text her cousin asking her to call her in a couple of hours. When Joann’s first class was over, she stopped in the hall to call her cousin Linda. This time her phone rang and rang but Linda didn’t answer. Joann called her aunt Cathy and told her that she still can’t get a hold of Linda. Her aunt told Joann that she will drive over to the house where she lives and check on her.

Joann went to her next class, while in Utah, aunt Cathy went to check on her daughter. Linda’s roommates, Sarah and Velma told aunt Cathy that the last time they saw her was yesterday morning. They didn’t notice that she hadn’t come home from her drive until now. Velma told aunt Cathy that Linda sometimes drives out to the nature preserve and takes a walk. Aunt Cathy asked about her college classes and both roommates said that she didn’t have any yesterday.

Aunt Cathy thanked the girls and went out to her car. She texted Joann that Linda is missing and that she is going to drive out to the preserve to look for her. Joann read the text while sitting in class, and a feeling of panic rushed over her. She tried to listen to what the instructor was saying, but all she could think of was her cousin Linda. She texts her aunt back to keep her informed.

When aunt Cathy arrived at the preserve, she saw Linda’s car. She parked next to it and looked inside it. The car was locked and there was no sign of Linda in the car. Aunt Cathy walked on the nearest trail and called out for Linda. She walked for about a half-hour on the trail, looking around, and calling out Linda’s name. But there was no sign of her.

It was just after noon now and Joann was done with her classes for the day. She walked outside and called her aunt Cathy.

“I can’t find her Joann,” aunt Cathy answered her phone.

“Are you still at the preserve?”

“Yes, and I can’t find her anywhere,”

“I think that you need to call the police, aunt Cathy.”

“Yes, you’re probably right. Let me call them and I’ll call you back,” aunt Cathy said.

Aunt Cathy did just that and told them where she was. She turned around and headed back towards the cars. She also called Joann back and told her that the police were on their way. Joann said that she was going to book a flight to go up there but her aunt Cathy told her to wait. Joann hesitantly agreed but said if Linda isn’t found by tomorrow morning that she is flying up. Aunt Cathy asked Joann a few questions about the last conversations that they had. And if she was seeing anyone who she didn’t know about.

“No aunt Cathy, she wasn’t seeing anyone, I swear,” Joann said.

“Okay, I believe you, dear… I’m back in the parking lot and I hear the police sirens. So, I’m going to let you go so I can talk to them,” aunt Cathy said.

“Okay, text me later and tell me what the police are going to do about it,” Joann said.

“I will.”

Joann ended the call and put her cell phone in her back pocket. How can I focus on anything when Linda is missing, she thought. She walked across the campus grounds to her dorm room hoping that her aunt Cathy will call her with good news. When Joann walked into her room, she took her phone out of her pocket and plopped down on her chair. She looked at her phone and decided to call Linda’s cell phone. Scrolling through her contacts, she hit Linda’s number. I sure hope that she answers, Joann thought. But she didn’t.

In Utah, aunt Cathy was talking with the police about her daughter. She told them that Linda walks the preserve often and has never had any problems. They asked her how their relationship was and if they had any disagreements lately. Aunt Cathy informed them that everything between Linda and her have been great. And that Linda recently shared more of her college goals with her. The police asked for a recent picture of Linda so she showed them. Deputy Rhonda Dean had aunt Cathy text the picture to her so that she could send it to the whole department.

If you would like to read more of this story right away you can go to https://penniersn.substack.com/ to continue. Otherwise I will post most of it on here soon.

Self Promotion

Along with writing about various topics on my blog here, I really enjoy fiction writing. I am working on a short story right now that I hope to have published in one of my favorite magazines, the Ellery Queen Mystery Magazine.

I also write a few stories per week on https://penniersn.substack.com/ . If you enjoy reading mystery, crime, and stories focused for children then you’re going to want to check them out. One of my stories on there is reader supported which helps me out. But I also have at least one and sometimes two stories that I usually keep free.

If you haven’t checked out Pennie’s Writing’s on Substack yet you might want to. I have an ongoing part fiction part fact story about the daily life of two cats that live in a house with their Mom and Auntie. Dukee and Mia are the two cats and as the story progresses they make new friends with a lizard, a stray cat, and a female cardinal who all come to visit them. It’s a nice story to read to your children. The ghost/murder mystery titled, “The Ghosts Three” (reader supported), will be coming to a conclusion soon but I usually start a new story soon after a conclusion. I also started a story titled “Unknown Encounter” which is free at the moment. That story involves a missing college student and some unexplained activity.

When you browse Pennie’s Writing’s on https://penniersn.substack.com/ You will also see that I have written two other completed stories. “Rose’s Ghost” which is about a 30 year old woman who inherited her grandmother house. Some strange things happen at the house which leads Rose to finding a dead body in her basement. And “The Beast At Flag Beach” is about a beach community sheriff that has to do everything he can to keep his community safe from a creature that comes out of the ocean and kills.

When you subscribe to my stories on Substack, whether paid or free they will be sent directly to your email. You won’t ever have to worry about missing a chapter or story. But you can also read them directly when you go to: https://penniersn.substack.com/ . Thank you to all my followers on here and on Substack. Without you, my dream of being a successful writer might not come true.

Am I A Loser

I haven’t really thought of myself as a loser until lately. From the online version of the Webster dictionary, I’m comparing myself to the first part of number two, a person who is incompetent or unable to succeed.

What I have experienced in the last few days is what has led me to struggling with this thought of being a loser. You see, my cat means the world to me and he caught me off guard one morning when he threw up. This is unusual for him so my worry button was pushed. He later ate some food and about an hour or so later he threw up again and again. He wasn’t able to keep anything down for a day and a half. This is where my panic button was pushed and I prayed and prayed for him to get better. This is also where Am I A Loser? popped into my thinking as well.

Let me first tell you that my cat must have found and eaten something that didn’t agree with him which made him sick but he is back to his normal eating and silly self, thank you God. But this incident paralyzes me because my world sort of stopped. I’m feeling like a loser because I’m 56 years old and I don’t have any income or retirement funds. What if I had to take my cat to the vet? I don’t have any money, and I can’t ask my family because they barely have enough to live on themselves. My anxiety kicked in so bad the other night that I had to take one of my meds to calm me down. Sure after a while I calmed down but it doesn’t solve the no money problem.

You might be asking why don’t I have a job? Well, I have tried but have been unsuccessful. This is where it gets even more depressing for me. Since I moved to Florida in 97 and started working in various retail stores, I have had at least three nervous breakdowns. I struggle with a few mental illnesses and anxiety is one them. I hate using my mental illnesses as an excuse but it is what holds me back a lot. I do keep trying though. When I have a job I work hard so I’m not lazy. But when my mental health starts to suffer and my anxiety starts to take over, I end up leaving the job which really sucks!

I was even in a relationship for 18 years with a great guy, but because of my poor mental health becoming a serious factor it ended. I was in a couple of other relationships over the years but I struggled with those as well. If you have ever dealt with anxiety or any other mental illnesses then you can understand. Many people don’t understand how serious it can be.

Since December of 2020 I have been living with my older sister, her boyfriend, and my dad. I applied for various jobs in the area where we live and haven’t had any luck getting one. In 2021 my sister’s boyfriend passed away because of Covid-19. He had a great job and was able to support my sister who has physical disabilities. But now, with her monthly disability which isn’t much and my dad’s social security, we are struggling big time. My sister doesn’t know if she will be able to keep her car because of her low income. I have still applied at a few more places and have had a couple of interviews but no one wants to hire me.

Because of my anxiety and that no one here wants to hire me is why I decided to become a writer. I’ve been writing for six months now and except for a few followers whom I appreciate greatly, I don’t feel like I’m getting anywhere with it. I thought I had a good writing gig which would pay well and I could support my family with, but it turned out to be a scam. I feel like I am letting my family down. I should be in a well paying job at my age and be able to support my 92 year old dad and my older sister but I can’t. And I can’t help but think about what’s going to happen when my dad passes away. Am I going to be bringing in any money to where I can help my sister? Tears are flowing now just thinking about it.

Am I a loser? I can’t help but think it right now even though I know that I’m not. I’m not writing this for sympathy either. I’m writing this because it helps me to get it out of my head, and show others that if they feel this way too, that they are not alone. I think that we all feel like a loser at times when things don’t go the way we think that they should. And some of you may struggle even more than I do. I don’t know what my future holds for me, only God does. But I do know that I just have to keep trying like I have all these years. As much as I want to give up on life sometimes, I know that my family and God doesn’t want me to give up. I just have to keep the faith and believe that all will work out as long as I keep trying.

So for any of you who may be thinking that you are a loser or that you are not pulling your weight in life, you are not alone. If you continue to try and not give up, that’s a big step. If you struggle with your mental health, seek help because it’s out there. If you are struggling financially, you are not alone. So many people are which is sad. Just try to stay strong, reach out to God, and never ever give up. If you feel that you are in a mental crisis you can now dial 988 for a crisis hotline and talk to a professional. May God bless you with a better future.

Jurassic World 3/Dominion

From Jurassic World Dominion movie

Disappointment

My sister and I went to see the new Jurassic movie with anticipation. We sat in the way back, and up high, and enjoyed our snacks that my sister bought us. When the movie started I didn’t have that feeling of awe and excitement like I had in the past movies. I watched as dinosaurs were living within the present world and being held captive in unsavory ways. I didn’t get that feeling of fantasy at all like in the original movie. But I gave it a chance and kept watching.

Edge Of The Seat –

As I watched this movie, it did keep me interested and even at the edge of my seat in some scenes. Dinosaurs running toward the screen and nearly getting a bite of the actors. It had been a long while since I had been in a movie theater so it could have been the large screen that contributed to that anxious feeling. My sister had asked me when we arrived if I wanted to see it in 3D and I told her that regular format was fine. During one of the scenes where the one dinosaur ran toward the screen and looked like it was going to hop into my lap, I whispered to her that I was glad that we didn’t see it in 3D.

Story line –

Once I understood the direction of the story, the way they filmed it made more sense to me. The way I understand it is that they were trying to create a safe sanctuary again for all dinosaurs in our world after the previous movie. Once they got back in control from the Bio company in this movie. I was unsure at first of the locations where they filmed this movie but they managed to make it work. And bringing in the characters/actors and actresses from the original movie brought back the authentic love for dinosaurs to this movie.

I liked how they had Jeff Goldblum’s character working for the bio company which made his now personal character questionable. But he was only in there to keep an eye on how things were going. And then B.D. Wong ended the movie as a good guy again so to speak. But if they were to continue another movie, with all that he has learned and knows, I could see him causing problems in the future.

Conclusion –

Overall I enjoyed the movie once I gave it a chance. It takes me a few times seeing a movie to pick up everything but I think that they did a good job. I like how at the end, the dinosaurs did finally have a place of their own again and that Blu and her baby lived in the woods not far from Owen (her trainer) and Claire. I also had that feeling of awe and fantasy at the end this time rather than at the beginning. And it was a great afternoon spent with my big sister. Thanks Sis!